europole

this weekend was pretty fun. on friday justin, ramon, marbrisa and i went to sushi deli. we didnt have to wait very long at all. i had two large crazy milks which pretty much set me up to get pretty trashed. one beer later and a few joints and i was feeling more than fine. i still have to post the last 2 weekends up on flickr. anyway, hung out at maries house and really got comfy on her porch. its such a sweet little house. very happy for her, colin and katie.

the next day i didnt feel so great. now when i drink i am pretty much out of commision until the day after. a sign of age? doubt it. more like i actually do something besides party these days and i am overall more tired than a few years ago. that doesnt make much sense.

faith, justin and i went to farmers market and chicano park. went to some art gallery where i purchased loteria cards with illustrations done by posada. pretty awesome. went to a panaderia and bought some goodies (which i left in faiths car) and then headed to bustos and sarahs house for a bbq. when we got there bustos was drunk and there was no food. i wasnt feeling so well, so that kinda just irritated me more than it would have if i had been feeling great. anyway, faith and i left, i came home and chilled. dad and i went to a cinco de mayo party in the building. gross mexican food and old rich white people. oh, and free beer. i only had one and a half. i didnt even want any, i just felt like drinking because there wasnt much else to do. some people thought i was my dads girlfriend. gross. we left and hung out at home for a bit. thought i would go out but i didnt. i passed out at midnight instead.

the next day i woke up way to early and went to my moms house. my mom, max and i saw spider man 3. my mom liked it and my brother and i liked making fun of it. we went to fudruckers afterwards and i caught up with my mom and brother over some burgers and steak cut fries. afterwards i went back to my moms house and she showed me these awesome photographs from cuba she bought plus this great dia de los muertos pin she got me (she has a matching one on her bike)

drove back home to la and felt like crap. so tired and sleepy. came home and worked on a paper. took a midterm today and i doubt i did as best as i could. procrastination. i hate when you get a midterm and you realize you didnt have to read 95% of the shit you did, but it just so happens that the 95% you did read wasnt even on the fucking test. I hate school sometimes.

So torn about what to do after college, before grad school, blah blah blah. There is always this pressure from inside myself to be wild and crazy and move far away and be insane. Truth is I love my parents and grandparents and I hate being away from them for too long. I can finally appreciate what I have, i guess and having recently obsessed over life and death I dont want to miss any minute away from them. I just dont know what to do. Honestly I think I'm depressed. This is too long of a blog entry. At the moment all I can think about is feminist discourse and updating my flickr.